Like many of our radio friends, you sidewalks, parking lots, driveways and porches are like the Olympic bobsled runs Thursday. While the main roads are pretty good, it's a sheet of black ice everywhere else. So, we got to thinking of what to do with our lot at Newstalk870, 1027KORD, 98.3THE KEY, HOT975 and 97Rock.

You can only have so much patience for de-icer, and it only goes so far.  Same for salt.  You need about 4-5 pounds to even make a dent in a 10-12 square foot area. So what would be some fun, politically incorrect, even dicey ways to remove ice from your domicile?

Let us begin by saying, DO NOT TRY THESE AT HOME...this is just for dreaming what you'd do if you won the lottery. Leave the stupidity to the guys on TruTV's World's Dumbest, ok?

  • Massive amounts of boiling water.  Heat up a 55 gallon drum to a nice bubbly mix. Pour on ice, watch it snap crackle and pop.  The drawback?  Might freeze again. But it's fun to consider. Given warmer weather, might work well.
  • Lighter fluid, mass amounts, plus barbeque lighter. Poof!  While it's spectacular, it doesn't have the explosive quality of gasoline.  It would mix in better and actually melt the ice.
  • Agricultural farm disc machine.  These are the ones with the large saucer shaped cutters that are used to cut furrows in farmland. Given the weight of those bad boys, the ice would look like it was attacked by Freddy Krueger when you're done with it.
  • Drop heavy weights from altitude.  Get a bunch of 45lb. or 100lb. weight plates from a gym. Drop from a scissor lift or crane.  Watch as the ice (and probably the pavement) goes 'crunch.'   (Saw a guy do this years ago with dumbbells at a gym I worked out at in Pullman after an ice storm. He just dropped them from arm's length).
  • Hook up industrial sprayer filled with WD-40. Apply to parking lot. Enough said.  :)

Again, don't try these at home. But it's always fun to come up with alternative ways to get rid of ice, especially when your mad about slipping and falling in the parking lot on your way into work, like myself.  Whee!

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